We Shouldn't Call It "Radical" - Francis Chan

I hope you'll take 35 minutes to listen to this.

June 7th - Looking back One year ago and Five years ago...

One Year Ago

One year ago today we met our sweet Havyn Marete in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.  Our little girl is a gift from God.  Her smile and laugh captured us from our first meeting with her, and we are grateful that we see that sweet smile and hear that precious laugh every day.

Here are some pictures from our first meeting with Havyn.

Five Years Ago

Five years ago today we went to court in Russia to adopt Jachin & Josiah.  We were under the impression that court was merely a formality, but quickly found out differently.  On June 7, 2007, we began the fight for our boy's lives.  We went to court again on June 12th, and again on June 19th, the fourth time on June 21st, and then had our fifth and final court hearing on June 27th.  I have to say that this was the most difficult time of my life.  Not knowing whether or not we would be able to bring our boys home was heartwrenching.  However, it was also a time when Greg and I were on our faces before the Lord.  He was our only hope.  He was the boy's only hope.  Many times it looked as if we would have to leave Russia without Jachin & Josiah and never see them again.  The thought of them staying in the orphanage, without their family who loved them, tore me to pieces.  We prayed and cried and pleaded with God for them during the 3 1/2 weeks of court.  Many other people were praying as well.  We knew that only God could perform this miracle, and that if they were to be our sons, it would only be because of God's sovereign hand.  We continue to marvel and praise God for our sons!

Here they are five years ago.

Jachin

Josiah

We went to see them for a quick visit after our fifth court hearing.  What
joy we had when the judge finally approved the adoption!  Unfortunately,
since we had stayed almost 4 weeks in Russia, our visas were expiring.
So, we had to leave the boys again to come back to the States and renew our visas.

Our sons left the orphanage forever on July 9th, 2007

Jachin and Josiah came home on July 20th, 2007

On the airplane.

Our friend, Monica, made a sign and put balloons on our mailbox.

You can't imagine the relief when we finally pulled into our driveway
with our sons!



Praise the Lord!

Praise, O servants of the Lord,
Praise the name of the Lord!
Blessed be the name of the Lord
From this time forth and forevermore!
From the rising of the sun to its going down
The Lord’s name is to be praised.

Psalm 113:1-3

 
It is good to look back.  It is good to remember.  It is good to continue to give God the glory for all that He has done!  We praise you, Father, for these precious children whom You have entrusted to us!


That was then and Here they are now!

Josiah, Jachin and Havyn, my precious gifts from God!

So Sentimental...(and pictures)

Yes, that would describe me.  I can't look at pictures of my kids without feeling just a touch of sadness that they are growing.  Oh, don't get me wrong; I'm glad that they are growing, getting big, strong and mature.  But...there's a piece of me that misses Josiah saying, "Tar" instead of "Car" and "Tow" instead of "Cow".  I miss Jachin's wide-eyed excitement over his first roller coaster ride.  I miss Havyn toppling over as she takes her first steps.  And someday I'll look back on the pictures from this past weekend and wish I could have more of that.  Maybe it's just me...I'm so sentimental about my kids.

I tell Jachin, Josiah and Havyn every day, several times a day, that I love them and that they are precious to me.  Oh my are they precious to me!!!  There is nothing that I would rather do than spend my days with them, loving them, teaching them and showing them that Jesus loves them. 

I have been reading a book called The Connected Child by Dr. Karyn Purvis.   I have to admit that the first part of the book was really difficult for me to read.  First of all, Dr. Purvis talked about what orphans endure.  After chapter 1 & 2, I put the book down and called my friend, Stephanie (who just adopted two girls from the Ukraine).  I cried and poured out the sadness that was in my heart as I thought about what my kids have had to endure.  (I love Stephanie...she gets my sadness.  She feels it too.)   Knowing what I know about my children's first years of their lives will always pain me.

Secondly, I thought about things that I wish I had done differently as a parent.  There are things that I just didn't know.  I wish I had read this book before we adopted Jachin & Josiah.  I have asked God to release me from the guilt of mistakes that I feel that I made with them.  Of course, I know that I didn't make any mistakes that other parents don't make. We have and always will love them fiercely.  But....I wish I had been more patient at times.  I wish I had understood more about what they could and could not process.  (Sadly, since I am an imperfect person, I will continue to make mistakes...I just wish it was not the case)

But then there was today's reading.  Today I put the book down feeling encouraged.  I have been doing things that she suggested....completely out of ignorance, but it felt good knowing that I haven't done everything wrong (ha ha).  I think that in a way God was answering my prayer.  He does not want me to be weighed down with guilt.  In Him, we are free from guilt.  I think that God prompted me to read today to encourage me.  Jachin & Josiah are great boys.  They know that they are loved.  They know that I would give my life for theirs, and they know that Jesus did give His life for them. 

(Disclaimer: I think I need to mention (for the sake of those who do not know us personally) that we have never nor would ever harm our children.  The mistakes that I speak of are really those of which I am sure most parents struggle with...but maybe b/c of my personality and/or b/c of the knowledge of what my children suffered, I am saddened by my imperfections as a parent.  Hope that makes sense.  Surely I am not the only parent that looks back at times (especially after reading a parenting book, more specifically, an adoptive parenting book, and wishes that they had handled some situations differently...?)

Here are some pictures from this past weekend.  (The first one is of the boys after they came home in 2007.  It was their first time in a swimming pool.)

Two years old.  First time in a pool.  They have always loved water. 

Five years later and they still LOVE water!

Havyn's first time in a pool.  Her brothers wanted to show her how to
have fun. 

Who could resist that smile!  She is so precious!

The park is so much more fun with Daddy!

I can still hear him laughing.  Love it!

My little girl...always digging through my diaper bag and purses.
(usually pulling everything out)

Jachin & Josiah posed for about 10 pictures.  Little Miss refused to smile (she was hot and tired), but
 she sure didn't refuse to make a fuss.  Oh well, even her fussy face is cute!  :)

 

We're Expecting...

Yes, you read that correctly.  We are expecting child #4 and maybe #5.  Lord willing we will be adopting again from Ethiopia.  Our dossier (paperwork for Ethiopia) is finished.  Soon we will  officially be on our agency's waiting list for a referral, and we will do just that....wait....  Of course we hope that the wait will not be too long, but we also know that Havyn is not ready for us to travel.  She is still in the bonding phase, and we are very careful about protecting her heart as she continues to learn that she can trust us.  So....waiting right now is not all that bad, but talk to me in a year, and I may be saying something differently. 

Home Education

Someone posted this on Facebook today, and I just couldn't resist sharing.  I believe that parents have to make the decision regarding their children's education based on their own unique family.  Though we do not feel that public school is for our children, we also do not judge you if have your children in public school.  Why should we?  (BTW, We have friends who are excellent public school teachers.)  Will we homeschool our children through high school?  I don't know....we'll have to continue praying and asking God to give us wisdom.  For now, that is the method of education that we have chosen for our children, for reasons that could be given in another post, at another time.  We do not take this responsibility lightly.  We are thankful that we do have options in this country.

I post this because it made me smile, and because I think that more truth should be spoken about home education.  Hey, I know what I used to think about homeschooling...and I was so wrong!  So take it or leave it (insert sweet smile), but I happen to love this.... (you'll have to click on the link and then click on the picture after you open the link to get it full-sized.  It was either way too big or too small for this post.)

http://images.collegeathome.com.s3.amazonaws.com/homeschool-domination.jpg

Greg's 40th - A Weekend Away!

So...Greg turned 40 last week.  I thought about having a party for him, but Greg's really not into "parties", especially a party where the focus would be on him.  He would much rather spend some quality time with his family.  Friends of ours went to Willow Valley Resort overnight, and just like that, I knew exactly what the kids and I should give to Greg for his birthday. 

Time away with us!

Here are a few pictures of our time at Willow Valley.

Greg took the boys to Willow Valley while Havyn took her nap.  Havyn and I came
over after her nap.  She was a little unsure of the big water (even though she loves
tubby time)  But she eventually warmed up and enjoyed being in the water. 
She was super cute in her swim suit!

Our boys have always loved water.  When they were two years old,
getting their first bath in a hotel in Russia, they put their heads all
the way in the water and laughed and splashed, and they've been part fish ever since.
They were SO excited about being able to swim for two days.

Then we went to the McDonald's, that is across the street, for dinner.
We gave the boys a choice and they chose McDonald's - I'm sure that it
had nothing to do with the fact that it had a play area there.  
Here are the boys taking turns shooting baskets.

Havyn got in on some basketball fun too.

Love playing with Daddy!

Havyn reading her book in the hotel room before breakfast
the next morning.  Willow Valley has a really yummy breakfast buffet.
Little Miss ate nothing....I actually can't remember if I ate much.
I was just trying to get her to eat.  I remember having coffee...

This is the only picture of me from the whole weekend, so this is all
you get folks.  Not the greatest and I can't even believe I'm posting it.  But
I can say that I was enjoying my time with my family and this is proof. 

This is the sweetest picture!  Josiah adores his baby sister, and as you can see,
she loves him a whole lot too!

Happy Birthday, Daddy!
We love you so much!!!

Middle Road?

The Treasure of Jesus

Why do I care? 

Is it because they have no one to pray with them and tuck them in at night?

Yes.

Is it because they have no one to tell them that they are loved...unconditionally?

Yes.

Is it because there is no one to celebrate with them when they turn a year older?

Yes.

Is it because they have no one to cry to when they are hurt or afraid?

Yes.

Is it because they have no one to kiss their boo boo's and wipe away their tears?

Yes.

Is it because they have no one to protect them?

Yes.

Is it because they have no one to run to at night when they have a bad dream?

Yes.

Is it because they have no one who celebrates their dreams with them?

Yes.

Is it because they don't even know how to dream?

Yes.

Is it because they go day after day without being hugged and kissed?

Yes.

That's not enough! 

All of those things and more haunt me when I think of precious, little ones, alone

in this world.  But one thing haunts me the most. 

Why do I care?

Because they need Jesus.

Because they need to know that He celebrates with them.

Because they need to know that they can cry out to Him.

Because they need to know that He hears them.

Because they need to know that He loves them.

I care because they need to know the "treasure of Jesus". 

Not a day goes by that I don't think of the suffering, lonely children in the world.  Not a day goes by that I don't pray for them.  But if I only pray for their earthly suffering, I am not truly caring about them.  Oh if only they could know the treasure of Jesus.....     

"But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith."  Phil. 3:7-9

"For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son (Jesus), that whoever believes in Him will not perish but have everlasting life."  John 3:16

" Then people brought little children to Jesus for him to place his hands on them and pray for them. But the disciples rebuked them. Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”   Matthew 19:13-14   

I'm tired...

UPDATE 3/15:  So...we are trying the Jo Frost method of "controlled crying method".  We do our bedtime routine, hold her for few minutes and then put her in her crib as we reassure her.  Then we quietly leave.  She cries.  We wait 2 min.  We go in, lay her back down, without picking her up,tell her we love her and rub her back.  We leave.  She cries.  We repeat this process, adding a little time as we go.  She goes to sleep.  (I do the dishes and wonder if we are doing the right thing.) But guess what....she slept through the night last night.  A fluke?  We'll see.  I'll keep you posted......


Sleep...wait...what is sleep?  I've forgotten how it feels to be able to sleep through the night. Havyn cries several times a night and needs me to rock her or stand and bounce her back to sleep.  I am not exaggerating when I say that she will sleep until Greg and I finally get comfortable in bed.  It is then that she starts the crying.  This week has been extra challenging.

When we were in Ethiopia I noticed that Havyn would "head butt" to self soothe.  This is also how she would get her self to sleep.  She would "head butt" the crib.  Well, I certainly was not going to let her continue with that type of self-soothing behavior.  So, I began to rock her to sleep (which is also good for attachment).  After the first time that I rocked her to sleep, she would not go to sleep on her own again - not for naps and not for bedtime.  It is not unusual for me or Greg to rock her for 45 min. at night.  She doesn't always let Greg put her to sleep, though she loves her Daddy.  She cries and cries and cries until I come in. 

As I said, this week has been rough to say the least.  One night she kept crying about every half hour, and I just couldn't keep getting out of bed.  So, we ended up just having her sleep with us.  I think she slept some of the night.  We slept none of the night.  Last night I was up 5 times trying to put her back to sleep.  And tonight....well, just getting her to sleep was a nightmare.  Let's just say that I started at 7:22 (yes, I looked at the clock before I walked into the bedroom with her), and it was 9:05 by the time I got her into the crib.  By the end of the night we were both crying. 

So, what do we do about this?  Well, I don't really know, but someone (who recently adopted a little girl from Ethiopia around Havyn's age) suggested looking at Jo Frost's tips (The Super Nanny).  She used them and it worked.  So I checked out her tips about bedtime.  I really don't know what to do.  She does say in the tips that they should not be used at certain times or for certain kids, including those who have been adopted and have abandonment issues.  Can I bear to hear her scream and not go into the room?  I don't know.  Will it cause trauma for her?  I just don't know.  Here's the link....what do you think?  http://jofrost.com/jos-techniques/controlled-timed-crying-technique-ctct  

I am tired.  Greg is tired.  We are at a loss for these sleep issues.  I wouldn't mind some advice, but just keep in mind that at times a parent must parent differently a child who was adopted.  There are things to consider that a parent does not need to consider when dealing with a biological child. 

(Forgive me if there are mistakes - I read over it again, but.....I'm tired)

Here are a few pictures of our beautiful Havyn from one night a few weeks ago. 

Mila and Yana are home!

After just shy of two months in the Ukraine, our very dear friends, Cory and Stephanie have

brought home their daughters, Mila and Yana.  Watching them walk through the doors at the airport

with their daughters made my heart soar.  I just wanted to jump up and down with praise for our God, who redeems the lost and makes all things new!  What a picture adoption is of the Gospel! 

These precious girls will no longer languish in an institution but will thrive with their new mommy and daddy, 3 brothers and older siser...WOW!  And most importantly, they will hear

the name of Jesus and know His great love for them!  How can we not praise Him!!!

We love you, Kimble family!!!

Created for...

Life is short...so, so short.   With all my heart I want this life that God has given to me to matter eternally.  After all, I was created for one purpose...to bring glory to my God.  And so were you.

  

   

Amazima Ministries: Katie Davis at Catalyst--video

Amazima Ministries: Katie Davis at Catalyst--video: Katie was in the United States in October promoting her book, Kisses from Katie , and was blessed to speak at Catalyst East (Atlanta). F...

Missing Family!

One of our pastors forwarded information, to us and some others in our church, that was given to him about a 13 year old Ethiopian boy.
This young man really wants to be adopted and have a family of his own.  PLEASE...if you know of someone who may be interested or if you want more information about this boy, contact the agency listed below.  I do not have a picture of him, and am not permitted to post a picture.
I am PRAYING for this young man.  His time is running out to have a family.  My heart just aches for him.  Please, if you don't know of anyone, Pray for him.  God is able to exceedingly and abundantly more than we ask.  He loves this young man.  Read the description of him that was given to me below. 

He is 13yrs. Old and is in grade 7. He has excellent English for an Ethiopian child in his culture and is often translating for other children with foreigners. He loves to sing and has learned to play keyboards, flute, harmonica, and anything else he gets in his hands. He is driven to connect with others and can relate well to adults as well as children. He says he loves young children and would like to be placed with younger kids or with other siblings. He is often seen in Ethiopia with a younger blind child tagging along next to him, holding onto his arm. He likes to make jokes and tease, and can have long conversations with adults. Other children are often drawn to this young man. He works hard in his school work and says he has no time for a girlfriend until he has finished college and gotten his first job. He also says he wants very much to come to America and have the chance to excel with his disability. He says he knows there will be challenges with living in a family with rules, but he believes he can handle this challenge. This young man is a remarkable kid and has captured the hearts of many foreign visitors who have travelled to northern Ethiopia. There is something incredibly special and unique about this young man…like he is a treasure waiting to be fully discovered!

Christian families wanting more information can contact WACAP and talk to Family Finders for more information.

The Kimble Family

Our very good friends, Cory and Stephanie Kimble, are in the Ukraine right now, and have been there for 2 1/2 weeks adopting two, precious girls.  I want to invite you to follow their journey and support them in prayer as they navigate the adoption system to bring their girls home.  Here is the link to their blog, Over the Rainbow. 

They found their girls on Reece's Rainbow, an adoption ministry to help find families for "special needs" children.  I would encourage you to visit the Reece's Rainbow website as well, and pray for these children.  Look at their faces.  Commit to pray for even one child.

Happy One Year Birthday, Havy Girl!

Sweet, beautiful Havyn,
It was your birthday, but we received the best gift - YOU!  You truly are a precious gift from God to us.  To be able to celebrate one year of life with you brought us so much joy.  We praise God for your life!
Psalm 139:14-16
"I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well.  My frame was not hidden from you,when I was being made in secret,
intricately woven in the depths of the earth.  Your eyes saw my unformed substance;in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them."
You, precious girl, were fearfully and wonderfully made.  Your life has purpose and meaning, and we are blessed to be part of it. 
We love you!  Happy Birthday!
Mommy and Daddy


Havyn's birthday was November 13th.  I'm a little behind in my birthday blog, but that's just my life right now.  Blogging has definitely taken a minivan backseat.  We had a small party for Havyn, as she gets somewhat stressed with crowds.  Here are just a few pictures of my birthday girl.